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Solution focused Therapy SFT is a type of talking therapy that is based upon social constructionist philosophy. Focuses on what clients want to achieve through therapy rather than on the problems that made them to seek help. The approach does not focus on the past, but instead, focuses on the present and future. The therapist uses respectful curiosity to invite the client to envision their preferred future and then therapist and client start attending to any moves towards it whether these are small increments or large changes.

To support this, questions are asked about the client’s story, strengths and resources, and about exceptions to the problem.

Questions :
The miracle question
The miracle question is a method of questioning that a coach, therapist, or counselor uses to aid the client to envision how the future will be different when the problem is no longer present. Also, this may help to establish goals.

Miracle Question Sample
Counselor Ask : "If you woke up tomorrow, and a miracle happened so that you no longer easily lost your temper, what would you see differently?" What would the first signs be that the miracle occurred?"
Client (a child) Respond: "I would not get upset when somebody calls me names"

Counselor wants the client to develop positive goals, or what they will do, rather than what they will not do, to better ensure success. So, the counselor may ask the client, "What will you be doing instead when someone calls you names?"

Scaling Questions
Scaling Questions are tools that are used to identify useful differences for the client and may help to establish goals as well. The poles of a scale can be defined in a bespoke way each time the question is asked, but typically range from "the worst the problem has ever been"  to "the best things could ever possibly be".

The client is asked to rate their current position on the scale, and questions are then used to help the client identify resources (e.g. "what's stopping you from slipping one point lower down the scale?"), exceptions (e.g. "on a day when you are one point higher on the scale, what would tell you that it was a 'one point higher' day?") and to describe a preferred future (e.g. "where on the scale would be good enough? What would a day at that point on the scale look like?")

Exception Question
Exception Seeking Questions Proponents of SFT insist that there are always times when the problem is less severe or absent for the client. The counselor seeks to encourage the client to describe what different circumstances exist in that case, or what the client did differently. The goal is for the client to repeat what has worked in the past, and to help them gain confidence in making improvements for the future.

Coping questions
Coping questions are designed to elicit information about client resources that will have gone unnoticed by them. Even the most hopeless story has within it examples of coping that can be drawn out: "I can see that things have been really difficult for you, yet I am struck by the fact that, even so, you manage to get up each morning and do everything necessary to get the kids off to school. How do you do that?" Genuine curiosity and admiration can help to highlight strengths without appearing to contradict the clients view of reality. The initial summary "I can see that things have been really difficult for you" is for them true and validates their story. The second part "you manage to get up each morning etc.", is also a truism, but one that counters the problem focused narrative. Undeniably, they cope and coping questions start to gently and supportively challenge the problem-focused narrative.

Problem free talk
Problem free talk is often overlooked by whom? as a technique. In solution-focused therapy it is thought to be a useful technique for eliciting resources. Many people (who?) do leisure activities that relax them, or have experiences of being assertive, and many other useful resources that can help within the therapy.

Solution focused therapists will talk about seemingly irrelevant life experiences, like leisure activities, meeting with friends, relaxing and managing conflict. The therapist can also gather information on the clients values and beliefs and their strengths. From this discussion during the therapy session the therapist can use these strengths and resources to move the therapy forward.

For example:
If a client wants to be more assertive it may turn out that under certain life situations they are assertive. This strength from one part of their life can then be transferred to the area with the current problem.

if you want complete explanation, i suggest you http://www.psychpage.com/family/library/sft.htm

Solution Focused Therapy

Solution Focused Therapy (SFT) Theories

The Big Five model is considered to be one of the most comprehensive, empirical, data-driven research findings in the history of personality psychology. Identifying the traits and structure of human personality has been one of the most fundamental goals in all of psychology. Over three or four decades of research, these five broad factors were gradually discovered and defined by several independent sets of researchers. These researchers began by studying all known personality traits and then factor-analyzing hundreds of measures of these traits (in self-report and questionnaire data, peer ratings, and objective measures from experimental settings) in order to find the basic, underlying factors of personality.

1. OPENNESS
People with low scores on openness tend to have more conventional, traditional interests. They prefer the plain, straightforward, and obvious over the complex, ambiguous, and subtle. They may regard the arts and sciences with suspicion, regarding these endeavors as uninteresting. Some self-statements pertaining to openness include

Openness Sample

• I have a rich vocabulary.
• I have a vivid imagination.
• I have excellent ideas.
• I spend time reflecting on things.
• I use difficult words.
• I am not interested in abstractions. (reversed)
• I do not have a good imagination. (reversed)
• I have difficulty understanding abstract ideas.(reversed)

2.CONSCIENTIOUSNESS
A tendency to show self-discipline, act dutifully, and aim for achievement. The trait shows a preference for planned rather than spontaneous behavior. It influences the way in which we control, regulate, and direct our impulses. Conscientiousness includes the factor known as Need for Achievement

Sample conscientiousness :

• I am always prepared.
• I am exacting in my work.
• I follow a schedule.
• I get chores done right away.
• I like order.
• I pay attention to details.
• I leave my belongings around. (reversed)
• I make a mess of things. (reversed)
• I often forget to put things back in their proper place. (reversed)
• I shirk my duties. (reversed)

3. EXTRAVERSION
Characterized by positive emotions, surgency, and the tendency to seek out stimulation and the company of others. The trait is marked by pronounced engagement with the external world. Extraverts enjoy being with people, and are often perceived as full of energy. They tend to be enthusiastic, action-oriented individuals who are likely to say "Yes!" or "Let's go!" to opportunities for excitement. In groups they like to talk, assert themselves, and draw attention to themselves.

Introverts lack the social exuberance and activity levels of extraverts. They tend to seem quiet, low-key, deliberate, and less involved in the social world. Their lack of social involvement should not be interpreted as shyness or depression. Introverts simply need less stimulation than extraverts and more time alone. They may be very active and energetic, simply not socially.

Extraversion sample :

• I am the life of the party.
• I don't mind being the center of attention.
• I feel comfortable around people.
• I start conversations.
• I talk to a lot of different people at parties.
• I am quiet around strangers. (reversed)
• I don't like to draw attention to myself. (reversed)
• I don't talk a lot. (reversed)
• I have little to say. (reversed)

4. AGREEABLENESS
A tendency to be compassionate and cooperative rather than suspicious and antagonistic towards others. The trait reflects individual differences in general concern for social harmony. Agreeable individuals value getting along with others. They are generally considerate, friendly, generous, helpful, and willing to compromise their interests with others. Agreeable people also have an optimistic view of human nature. They believe people are basically honest, decent, and trustworthy. source

Disagreeable individuals place self-interest above getting along with others. They are generally unconcerned with others’ well-being, and are less likely to extend themselves for other people. Sometimes their skepticism about others’ motives causes them to be suspicious, unfriendly, and uncooperative.

Agreeableness sample:

• I am interested in people.
• I feel others’ emotions.
• I have a soft heart.
• I make people feel at ease.
• I sympathize with others’ feelings.
• I take time out for others.
• I am not interested in other people’s problems. (reversed)
• I am not really interested in others. (reversed)
• I feel little concern for others. (reversed)
• I insult people. (reversed)
• I like being isolated. (reversed)

5. NEUROTICISM
The tendency to experience negative emotions, such as anger, anxiety, or depression. It is sometimes called emotional instability. Those who score high in neuroticism are emotionally reactive and vulnerable to stress. They are more likely to interpret ordinary situations as threatening, and minor frustrations as hopelessly difficult. Their negative emotional reactions tend to persist for unusually long periods of time, which means they are often in a bad mood. These problems in emotional regulation can diminish the ability of a person scoring high on neuroticism to think clearly, make decisions, and cope effectively with stress.

At the other end of the scale, individuals who score low in neuroticism are less easily upset and are less emotionally reactive. They tend to be calm, emotionally stable, and free from persistent negative feelings. Freedom from negative feelings does not mean that low scorers experience a lot of positive feelings.

Neuroticism Sample:

• I am easily disturbed.
• I change my mood a lot.
• I get irritated easily.
• I get stressed out easily.
• I get upset easily.
• I have frequent mood swings.
• I often feel blue.
• I worry about things.
• I am relaxed most of the time. (reversed)
• I seldom feel blue. (reversed)

Big Five Personality Traits Factors

Personality Traits - Big Five Factors

Counseling psychology is a unique psychological specialty that encompasses research and applied work in several broad domains. Its fundamental aim is to provide therapeutic treatments to individuals. This makes it one of the largest specialty areas within psychology. A counseling psychologist's main focus is to help people with a diverse array of mental health problems. In doing this a strong emphasis is paid to understanding the interpersonal dynamics of therapy.

The Society of Counseling Psychology describes it as a field that primarily facilitates different interpersonal functioning across the life span, with a major focus on social, vocational, health-related and emotional concerns. The discipline is relatively new and requires both knowledge of psychology with an understanding of therapeutic practice.

Today those pursuing counseling psychology as a career, will find a large vista of career paths. Though many counseling psychologists are involved in providing psychotherapy services, there are many other career paths available. These include those related to teaching, vocational counseling, and. conducting research. In recent years, many large corporate organizations now employ psychology counselors, as workplaces are becoming prime sources of psychological and emotional stress. In the same way many schools and colleges are also looking for counseling psychologists for guiding young students.

At present there is a range of options when it comes to making a career or studying counseling psychology. There are many institutes that provide psychology counseling courses, and also there are courses available online or through distance education. There are several points to be aware of before enrolling onto a course:

- Ensure that the course has an international accreditation
- Do a thorough background check on the psychology institute you have shortlisted
- Decide if you would like to study a course with a particular specialization - there are various options available.

Psychology is an exciting field. It will lead you into a world where you meet the whole spectrum of human difficulties. Whilst dealing with people and mental health problems is very appealing it is also very challenging. However, with patience and determination, successful career paths can be achieved in psychology counseling. All you require is an understanding of psychological theories and their application, and a desire to help people overcome their problems and move towards achieving their full potential.

Counseling Psychology - Studying Counseling

Love your Job

Change your mindset. What's bothering you about your current job? Do you have a bad boss? By allowing your boss to make you miserable, you are giving your boss power over your happiness. Don't give away your right to happiness. Ask yourself why your boss is making you unhappy. Keep asking why until you get some really clear answers.Recognize your own reaction. Next, recognize that your unhappiness is caused by your reaction to what your boss is doing, because you think that your boss doing something wrong. You can't change your boss.

Change your perspective. One way I have changed my perspective on a difficult boss situations was to think, "They don't know any better." And I leave it at that. Trying to change a boss is nearly impossible. Changing your perspective is quite possible.

Add some fun into your day. What can you do to make work a bit more tolerable? I recently met a woman who told me that she got away with using hot pink pens for her work. It was marginally acceptable at work, but she was able to do it and it made her happier.In my previous job, I liked to go out for lunch or coffee with friends or go for a walk in the middle of the afternoon on a rough day. Spice it up. What's marginally acceptable that would be a fun way to make your work more interesting? What little playful thing can you add into your day to make it a bit more fun?

Take a break. Five minutes or 15 minutes or your entire lunch hour can be a great way to take a break and have fun. Hang out with people you enjoy--not your grouchy cube mate. Keep good company, even if it's just you!

Get some help. It is useful to have an outside perspective when you're seeking something new. An outsider can help you dream of something bigger and better. Finding happiness today before creating a new life for tomorrow always makes transitions stronger and longer lasting. You can be happier in your current job. Actually, I strongly recommend that clients find peace in their current job before moving somewhere new.

Once you've made peace with your current job, it may be time to start looking for what you really want: a job that you love. http://ezinearticles.com/?Do-You-Love-Your-Job?-It-is-Possible&id=4032911

Enjoy in your Current Job - Feel Good First Tips

Performance management teaches managers and leaders how to influence behavior. When you think about it, the behavior of people is the only way anything gets done in business. If leaders don't understand behavior management methods and can't apply them consciously and correctly they are almost certainly decreasing some behaviors they want, and increasing some behaviors they don't want.

Every single accomplishment that takes place in any organization is dependent on behavior. Consequently the one thing that executives, managers and supervisors should know the most about is human behavior. No business or organization can survive and grow without knowing the conditions under which people do their best.

Every management system ever devised to bring out the best in people will fail if it violates the basic laws of human behavior. Most of us look at the behavior of other people and wonder why they do certain things. We look for the answer in what happened directly before the behavior in question. In other words we think that the behavior was caused. It was motivated by some sort of internal or external force driving need or desire.

When you understand behavior analysis you will realize that a person does things because of what happens to them when they do it. In other words, because of the behavior is not as a result of the conditions prior to the behavior but what happens and immediately after the behavior.

It might seem that scientific methods to change behavior are not practical for front-line leaders. But it is actually the most practical way to manage people. Everybody knows that people don't do what we tell them to do. Yet we run our businesses as though all the performance and productivity problems are caused by people who don't know what to do, don't want to do or simply don't care. So we try and find better ways of telling them what to do. A good example of this is training courses. We put people on training courses and tell them what to do. Then when they don't do it, we blame the training course or the unwilling course members.

When our behavior changes the environment in some way that we like, we repeat it. And when we do something that changes in the environment that we don't like, we stop it. Every single thing we do produces a consequence for us. If a company has got productivity problems, quality problems, cost problems then the behaviors associated with those undesirable outcomes are being reinforced. This is not theory, this is reality. People don't resist change provided the change delivers an immediate positive consequence for them.

We know that the best reinforcement is positive immediate and certain. Peers are the most effective source of reinforcement at work and the most underutilized. They are in the best position to deliver positive and immediate reinforcement. They can observe performance more closely and more often than managers or supervisors. The whole concept of teams has missed the concept of peer reinforcement and as a result has met with little success in improving overall organizational performance.

When peers recognize that they can and should be a major source of reinforcement for each other, improvements occur more frequently, much faster and last much longer. Source: http://bit.ly/dmCAnf

Managing Performance in the Workplace - Influence

IQ Tests Difficult, Unique and Diverse :  
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Variant Tests:

• Matrix Analysis 1
• Sequences Analysis 2
• Imagination Test 1
• Combination Tests 3
• Attentiveness Tests 2
• Memory Tests 2
• Logistic Skills 2
• Analogies Analysis 4
• Math Skills 2
• Spatial Skill 1
• Geometric Skills 5

What IQ test For ?

Give you  ability to evaluate your mental Skills and Resolving different Puzzles.

Answer 27 Questions, 60 Seconds for 1 question
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IQ Tests Difficult, Unique and Diverse

Employers have to do many types of tests of their employees to get right employees for right positions. There are many types of tests are done by the employers, among those Employment Testing and Performance Testing are very important. All these tests are done to know employees better. Employment Testing helps to know about physical, mental and historical background of employees.

Many kinds of other tests are done in Employment Testing according to the requirement of the jobs. Getting Employees through Employment Testing satisfies Employers need. And by Performance Testing the Employers knows about a employee performance, dedication to job, interest for job and the ability of the employee.

Employment Testing strategies are that allow employers to use pre post-hiring testing to place the right employees in the right positions. Although employment testing creates some risks, it can often provide employers with information that could otherwise only be gained the hard way after failure of the employment relationship.

The following issues that pertain to testing in the employment context: general federal standards applicable to employment testing under the Civil Rights Act, medical tests under the Americans with Disabilities Act, psychological, personality, or character tests, drug and alcohol testing, and polygraph testing. Employment testing includes many other testing according to the job.

Pre-employment Testing includes the measurement of job matching, aptitude, abilities, interest, personality, sales skills, soft skills, integrity, work ethic, customer service and evaluation of competencies during the employee selection process.

Post employment assessments includes employee evaluations / performance reviews, team building, team analysis, customer service, succession planning, coaching, training, and 360 multi rater feedback used for management and leadership development.

An employer cannot inquire or test as to whether an individual has a disability at the pre-offer stage of the selection process. The reference to entrance examinations allows employers to administer medical exams or physicals once an offer of employment is made but prior to actual work. Employers may make an offer of employment contingent on the results of a physical and mental examination, but only if all employees in the same job category are required to take the examination.

Medical examinations and inquiries
Post-offer, pre-employment medical tests may be very extensive in scope and are not limited to job-related items consistent with business necessity; however, if an employer screens out an applicant based on information obtained in the medical tests, that particular factor must be job-related and consistent with business necessity. We do a medical test to know whether such applicant is an individual with a disability or as to the nature or severity of such disability. This medical test includes: health test, blood test, urine test, breath test and vision test etc.

Physical Testing
Physical Tests are done to know whether the employee is physically challenged or not.

Acceptable inquiry.
A covered entity may make pre-employment inquiries into the ability of an applicant to perform job-related functions.

Psychological or Mental Testing
A psychological test is designed to reveal mental illness, but a particular employer says it does not give the test to disclose mental illness. But, the test also is interpreted by a psychologist, and is routinely used in a clinical setting to provide evidence that would lead to a diagnosis of a mental disorder or impairment (for example, whether an applicant has paranoid tendencies, or is depressed). Under these facts, this test is a medical examination.

Personality, Character, Integrity, and other Qualities
Employers are increasingly relying on tests that attempt to measure an applicant's psychological makeup, personality, character, integrity, or other qualities that may be relevant to a particular position. Collectively, we will refer to such tests as "character tests" for purposes of this paper. Character test, like all employment selection procedures, are subject to the general requirements; that is, they should be job-related and consistent with business necessity. Beyond that initial hurdle, character tests also raise other issues: whether they are medical in nature such that pre-offer testing is impermissible and whether they violate applicants' privacy interests.

Psychscreen tests
In this test we asked about the applicants' religious, sexual, and political beliefs to produce a psychological profile of the applicants. This employment testing is very personal and private of applicant's.

Employee Drug and Alcohol Testing.
Drug and alcohol testing are increasingly popular means for employers to increase the safety and efficiency of their workforce, reduce workers' compensation claims, and reduce losses. While the benefits of drug testing can be great, the risks posed by implementing a drug-testing program can be significant and daunting. Individuals who are currently using illegal drugs are specifically precluded from "disability" on that basis. It appears that drug use within two months of the test will be considered current. Therefore, it is permissible to conduct a drug test even before a job offer. The safer course, however, would be to conduct a drug test after a job is offered but before employment begins, because the same test that can reveal the existence of illegal drugs may also reveal the existence of prescription drugs that indicate a disability. Since a test for the current use of illegal drugs is not a medical examination, employers may also drug test their existing employees without violating the ADA.

In contrast, an alcohol test will probably be considered a medical test. Alcoholism is a protected disability under the ADA and the EEOC takes the position that pre-offer alcohol testing is prohibited under the ADA.

Applicant Testing
Some employers require a drug screen of every applicant for employment. A test for current use of illegal drugs may be conducted before an offer is given, but an alcohol test may only be given to an applicant post-offer. So applicant testing is considered the safest drug-testing alternative.

Reasonable Suspicion or For-Cause Testing
Some employers test current employees based on erratic performance or other indications that an employee may be under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Reasonable suspicion testing can be risky, since an employer will frequently have to base the suspicion on a supervisor or co-worker's subjective impressions of an employee's behavior or performance.

Employees often argue that the employer did not have sufficient cause to test the employee for drug or alcohol use and that the employer tested the employee for drugs in violation of contract or based on some discriminatory basis, such as race, sex, or disability. Therefore, before conducting reasonable suspicion testing, an employer should ensure that the "cause" includes specific behavior or performance, preferably documented by more than one source.

Random Testing
Some employers test randomly across their entire workforce. Random testing raises the possibility of invasion of privacy concerns most acutely, because it tests current employees, but is unrelated to behavior or performance. With random testing, it is therefore particularly important to place employees on notice that they are subject to random drug testing and may be disciplined if they fail or refuse to take a random drug test. Such notice reduces employee's reasonable expectations of privacy and hence reduces the risk of an invasion of privacy claim. Random testing is preferred by many employers because the existence of a random selection process is easier to show than "reasonable suspicion" to conduct a drug test.

Post-Accident Testing
Some employers require an automatic drug test after any accident of at least a minimum level of severity. This approach can be effectively used in combination with other testing methods. Post-accident testing provides some of the benefits of reasonable suspicion testing because it tests employees after a mistake has been made, but also provides some of the benefits of random testing because the testing is based on an objective event, rather than a supervisor's subjective belief. The key in implementing post-accident testing is to clearly define the types of workplace accidents that require a drug test and obtain employees' consent to drug tests in such circumstances.

Polygraph Examinations
The Employee Polygraph Protection Act of 1988 (EPPA) restricts the use of polygraphs by employers. An employer may request a current employee to submit to polygraph testing as part of an "ongoing investigation" only if the test is conducted in connection with an investigation of economic loss or injury to the employer's business, if the employee had access to the property in question, and if the employer has a reasonable suspicion that the employee was involved in the incident.

Federal regulations provide that reasonable suspicion for seeking a polygraph test may be based on information from a co-worker, the employee's conduct, behavior, or demeanor, and inconsistent statements made during an investigation

Performance Testing
Post-employment Testing include Performance Testing. After being a employee of a employer, a employer use to do a regular Performance Testing of the employee. These Performance Testing are done to know a employee performance better and better. By Performance Testing we get to know about a employee performance, dedication, interest for job and the ability of the employee.

Performance Testing is also good for the employee, because the probability of success of the employee depends on the performance of the employee. The better performance of the employee tends to success."Probability of Success" in Selecting A Top Performer: – Interview – 14% – Reference Checking – 26% – Personality Testing – 38% – Abilities Testing – 54% – Interest Testing – 66% – Job Matching – 75%

Conclusion
We do all these tests to get right employees for right positions. All these tests are done to know employees better. And many other kinds of tests are done in employment testing and performance testing according to the requirement of the jobs. And the main thing is getting Employees through Employment Testing and Performance Testing satisfies Employers. source http://bit.ly/cUZSUA

Pre Post Employment Test - Types of Employment Testing

Personality Traits
Women are attracted to more than just good looks, money, or fame in men and though there is a long list of personality traits that women feel are important. What may surprise you to learn is how many men overlook these sought after qualities that attract women consistently. The guys that seem to attract women consistently are not always those guys who have the money but those that know the secrets about what really attracts women.

• Confidence confidence and confidence
  A man's confidence indicates they can take care of their own needs as well as the woman's wants or desires. Confident men are able to display all the other traits women find attractive without bluster.
• Attentiveness
  Attentiveness is not necessarily listening when you do not wish to or pulling out chairs for an attractive woman. It is attention to her needs and those of others as well. Women are surprisingly perceptive about this quality and if you pay attention to her needs but are uncaring of others this indicates a lack of attentiveness.
• A sense of Humor
  A sense of Humor is desired by women and is an attractive feature in a man and a woman responds to a man who has the ability to share humor with her. This very attractive trait does not necessarily involve telling jokes but the ability to see humor in any situation.
• Sincerity and honesty
  Honesty simply means fewer complications in trying to remember what you already said. Women feel more secure with a man they feel is honest and sincere. Women are usually attracted to men who make them feel secure.
• Women find intelligence an attractive feature in a man.
  This doesn't mean he has to be a genius either or a nerd just a man able to comment on and discuss things that are interesting to them both. A man who is capable of carrying on an intelligent conversation is attractive to even the most successful of women.
  

All that is required to allow those personality traits expressions when you interacting with a woman and you will be amazed at how many women are attracted to you. http://bit.ly/bMAZe1

Whats Personality Traits that Will Attract Women?

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Pre-Employment Testing - IQ Test Part 2 Logical

Most people might as well flip a coin to determine if a person is lying, rather than trust their intuition or lie-detecting skills. However, the research also shows that some people are consistently good at detecting lies.

That's a rather important fact, and although it is typically ignored, it is not disputed by the researchers. They usually just mention it briefly, as though the small number of people who have these skills makes it insignificant.  Rather than brush them off as insignificant, it may be better to look at what these people are doing. Doesn't that seem like a more useful approach? And when we look, we see that one thing these human lie-detectors do is to use what they know about the individual.

When you watch for signs of lying, you need to use what you know about the person Behavior. In other words, try to think like a polygraph operator, by comparing behavior in persons under suspicion to their base behaviors. Look for a change in behaviors that may indicate lying.

For example, if a man always moves around in his chair, then this trait can't be considered as an indication of lying. On the other hand, if he is normally very calm under pressure, but starts shifting in his chair after certain questions, that is more likely to indicate lying. Always look for these personal habits and indications of lying.

This shows the flaw in the common scientific opinion which says you can't tell if someone is lying. Most research tests for things like eye-avoidance or sweating or hand movements, and finds that none of them reliably indicate a lie. However, they are looking at indicators only statistically, based on a general testing of a group, without relation to any known character traits or habits of the individuals being tested.

Examples: Suppose that out of a group of 100 people, 50 always looked away from you when they lied, and 50 always focused more directly on you when they lied. Those would be great indicators once you learned which people in the group had which behavior, right?

But a researcher asks the question, Is looking away correlated with lying? He has all 100 subjects lie when answering a question, and when 50 look away and 50 look right at the questioner, he determines that there is no correlation between looking away and lying. He'll also note that there is no statistical correlation between direct eye-contact and lying. This is despite the fact that in our example all 100 people give clear indicators that they are lying.

You see, he is looking for "universal indicators." It would be nice if there were some good universal signs of lying, some things that everyone did when lying. While there are some signs that are better than others, this approach has met with limited success. However, when you take what you know about the individual into account, you can do much better.

In fact, to take this to the next level, you should note exactly how a person behaves when he or she lies. That way, you'll have a decent indication he or she is lying the next time you see that behavior repeated. The more personal indicators you are aware of, the more certain you can be that the person is lying.

Consider:If such psychological "tells" or signs of lying were meaningless, there would be far fewer consistent winners in poker. There are consistent winners at poker, by the way, and they often win because they are good at spotting a "bluff." They also know the odds, of course. That is strong evidence right there that there are signs of lying which are useful.source:http://bit.ly/aGvZiq

Signs of Lying - Behaviors May Indicate Lying

"A big part of the stress in our lives is caused by the negative chatter that goes on constantly in our minds."

• Negative Emotion - FEAR
  Caused by impending danger or pain real or imagined. It's caused by our desire to avoid any kind of pain be that physical, emotional or even financial.
• Negative Emotion - SELF-PITY
  Feeling sorry for ourselves for our perceived suffering or misfortune. This is our reaction to a negative circumstance or action "done to us" that we feel injured us.
• Negative Emotion - ENVY
  This is a feeling of discontent arising as a result of others success and good fortune. We see other people doing well and immediately feel hard-done-by because we don't have the same level of success.
• Negative Emotion - JEALOUSY
  This is the feeling of losing a partner or possession to another. It comes from our own insecurities and also a lack of trust in others.
• Negative Emotion - Feelings of Inferiority
  This is the feeling caused by perceiving ourselves as being less worthy and capable than others. It leads to a lack of self confidence and an unwillingness to take chances in life. This in turn will lead to a lower level of achievement in life.
• Negative Emotion - ANGER
  This is the feeling of severe displeasure or extreme annoyance prompted by our own perception of people, circumstances and events that we experience in life. It is us passing judgement on that person or happening.How to Control angry feeling?

These negative emotions are such a problem because, not only do they make you unhappy, they poison your relationships, give your kids a negative view of the world and ultimately stall yours and your children's success.

ROOT CAUSE

• Justification
  Justification is you justifying your negative emotion. You feel that you are entitled to be negative because of what happened. You put yourself in the victim role. This is a downward spiral into negative emotions that will drain you.
• Rationalisation
  You putting a good spin on something that isn't too good. You explain away your reaction to make your behavior socially acceptable. You make excuses, both to yourself and others, because you feel uncomfortable about what you've said or done. This is going to provoke negative emotions in you because you are not dealing with and putting right whatever it is you are rationalising.
• Over-concern With Others Opinions
  Excessive worry about what other people think of us. We live our lives based on others reactions to us instead of our own desires and goals. This will increase our negative emotions as we will not be free to follow our own path to a successful and happy life if we are always looking at how other people think of us.
• Blame
  This is when we constantly blame other people or situations for our own behavior. We don't accept responsibility for our own lives and behavior, therefore we give our power away and sabotage our own happiness and success. This will cause increased negative emotions.

SOLUTION

• Accept total responsibility.
  Accepting total responsibility for your life, recognizing that your thoughts have shaped your reality, is the key to the freedom of creating the life you want. Regularly use the affirmation: "I am responsible".
• Refuse to blame.
  Don't blame others for what happens. Sometimes it's really tough, but we are responsible for how we react to others actions; we can react in a way that builds up and mends relationships or make things worse by our reaction. Don't blame, look for the solution and move on.
• Don't make excuses or justify yourself
  Making excuses and justifying our behavior is a pointless exercise, all it does is build up your negativity. We need to apologize for what we've done that's wrong and ask how you can make it right. That way you can feel right with yourself and the relationship is hopefully back on a good footing. Incidentally this also applies to a fall-out with our kids. If we apologize to them when we're wrong, they will learn to be mature in this way too.
• Refuse to critisize, condemn or complain.
  Every time we critisize someone or complain about something we are putting a negative vibe out there. Also with each negative thought it becomes more likely that you'll have more similar negative thoughts, in time these patterns of thought become beliefs that limit your life. We need to stop the downward cycle by becoming aware of our negative thoughts and when one pops up saying something to yourself like "thanks for sharing" then carrying on realizing that the thought wasn't true.

The positive emotions of love, peace, joy, hope and enthusiasm will flow in to take the place of the negativity which will ebb away. You will be in a better place to improve your relationships. You will start to feel a new excitement and creativity in your life which could lead to an exciting new start for you. Source: http://bit.ly/duOpq5

Free Yourself from (Cynical Thought) Negative Emotions

First Congratulation, don't forget celebrate it with your friends and your family, before you reading this, i suggest you to read How to being a good Supervisor.

So how do you make this transition? unfortunately most companies don't offer much training when they promote someone to supervisor. They may send you to one of those one-day seminars but you want to get off on the right foot now. So what you have to do? this simple things you can do (commonly) :

• Don't let the promotion go to your head
  It's true you must have done something right to get promoted, but it doesn't suddenly make you smarter then you were yesterday and it doesn't make you better then the people you are now supervising. If you walk around with an inflated ego, everyone will notice and no one will appreciate it.
• Talk to your new direct reports
  Most likely your boss will tell them about the promotion and you might have a chance to say a few words but that will be brief and not really sufficient. You should sit everyone down within a few days of the change for, exp :

+ Group Meeting
+ Let them know you will meet with each of them individually to discuss their roles and to set down expectations as well as address concerns.
+ Ask them what they expect from you.
+ Tell them what you expect from them.
"Obviously you need to figure this out before you talk to them, but things like what they need to clear through you, how you will communicate information, how you would like to be informed of things (email, brief meeting)."
+ Individual Meeting
+ Ask them how they feel about the change, do they have any concerns, are there any outstanding issues you should know about.
+ Prior to the meeting ask to review each person's file, so you can see what they were rated in for their last performance review, if there were any discipline issues, you should discuss this during your one-on-one to make sure you get it in the open and set your expectation going forward.
+ Discuss what they are working on and set expectations or set a time for a follow up meeting to set expectations (you may not know enough to set them during this first meeting)
+ Take extra time with people you were closer with to discuss how this change will impact your friendship. Unfortunately going forward you shouldn't be having lunch with your buddies unless it is with the whole department.

If you think you can maintain an outside of work friendship, go ahead, but use caution, you don't want people accusing you of playing favorites and you have to be able to perhaps discipline your friend, and heaven forbid, terminate them.

• Set up regular meetings
  Department meetings as well as one-on-one meetings to make sure you are staying in touch and communicating effectively.
• Find a mentor
  If it isn't your direct boss then seek out someone who you consider an effective supervisor or manager and see if they will help you grow and develop in your new role.

Becoming a supervisor can be a rewarding experience and the more you are willing to ask for help and admit you don't have all the answers the better you will be. Remember to communicate with your direct reports and with your boss, keeping everyone informed will help avoid unnecessary problems and issues.

If you have the opportunity to go to training classes, make sure you go, don't say you don't have time and don't think you know it all. Even if you learn only one thing, it's more then you knew yesterday. Also, training classes give you a chance to network with other supervisors and seek out advice and support after the class is over - and that goes for internal and external classes.

Like most things, supervising people always looks easier from the outside looking in, but you can be an effective supervisor if you are willing to keep an open mind, ask for help, and realize you can always learn something...http://bit.ly/PromotedtoSupervisor

I Was Promoted to Supervisor, But I Dont Know What to Do Now - Tips

We spend a large proportion of our time and our lives at work. With work related stress being a major cause of ill-health and unhappiness let us look at how to take better care of ourselves and how to take better control of our situations. Susan Leigh

Get The Most out of your Job - Be flexible

 "This attitude could make your job more interesting and enable you to become more competent in several other areas."

Many companies are going through change constantly in order to survive modern day business pressures and demands. New technology is always being developed and new business models being introduced to help companies improve their practices. Be aware that a job description is merely a guide to your required skills sets. If you are asked to do something outside of your job description try to treat it as an opportunity to grow and evolve new skills and abilities rather than as a cause of work related stress. You are entitled to ask for appropriate training but treat it as a positive opportunity.

Get The Most out of your Job - Be empathic

No doubt there are considerable pressures and demands being made on him or her, and they will have to achieve certain targets to justify their own job and yours. Appreciate that situation and realize that everyone has to earn their salary, overheads and more to keep the business ticking over.

Get The Most out of your Job - Smile
"It is about being pleasant, good natured and approachable."

Being happy is contagious. If you smile and look happy people around you will usually respond well. You will get a better reaction from the people you deal with. Smiling is not the same as being the office joker and wasting time. Looking as if you are happy to be there, doing your job.

Get The Most out of your Job - Be enthusiastic.
"Be proud of your work"

Helps you find more energy and satisfaction from the things that you do. It keeps your attitude and mindset positive and willing. Do your tasks with commitment and enthusiasm and you will find satisfaction and fulfillment from them, from filing papers to driving miles to the next meeting. Appreciate the opportunity to grow and do each task well..

Get The Most out of your Job - Be positive Thinking
"Negative though makes negative reaction"

Avoid gossip and negative people and attitudes. There is often more than one way of looking at something. Be aware of the potential for different points of view. Keep yourself in a receptive frame of mind. Negativity breeds negativity and is a major cause of work related stress. Work on surrounding yourself with positive thoughts and positive people.

The Simple guidelines above will help you to feel positive and in control of yourself and your work situation. They will help you to get the most out of your job. Have A nice day 

Getting the Most Out of Your Job - Simple Guidelines

Self-esteem is a term used in psychology to reflect a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs and emotions such as triumph, despair, pride and shame. A person's self-esteem may be reflected in their behavior, such as in assertiveness, shyness, confidence or caution. Self-esteem can apply specifically to a particular dimension or have global extent exp "I believe I am a good person, and feel proud of myself in general". http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-esteem

How many people pause to think that their children need help in building selfesteem as they grow up? It would not be surprising to find many parents overlooking this vital aspect of child growth selfesteem.

Experiences that children go through make them to be what they are when they grow up. In structuring selfesteem, selfconfidence and good image, children become competitive later on in life thus speaking their minds, challenge decisions and influencing the world positively.

"I did take time to monitor a seven year old boy who was seated near me at a restaurant. He sat up in his chair and had an almost adult like conversation with his father. Though I could not hear the conversation well, it got me thinking of what could have made the boy portray such confident self.

With further findings, I realized that it is not by chance that the boy was very confident self. Children, like adults have to be commended when they do something good. And when they make a mistake, avoid shouting at them. Instead, explain what would have been acceptable and this will help in building esteem." http://bit.ly/selfesteembuilding 

Self-esteem isn't bragging about how great you are. It's more like quietly knowing that you're worth a lot (priceless). It's not about thinking you're perfect  because nobody is , but knowing that you're worthy of being loved and accepted.

Children who take part in debate and other activities such as games that they like also build self-esteem as they practice to speak their minds. It is therefore important to enroll children in various mind engaging activities that open up their thoughts.

When possible, let children make decisions and see how they go about it. For example, you could give a child some money and let him write the order in which he would spend the money. From the list, get to understand how he prioritized the items and give an idea on how best to prioritize items. With practice, any child would build selfesteem and thus influence society.http://bit.ly/selfesteembuilding

Selfesteem Building in Children

How to Control Your Angry Feeling?

When angry feelings start bubbling up, take a "time out" for five or ten minutes. Go for a quick walk, take a few deep breaths, take your temper out on your pillow, yell at the sky – do what needs to do be done to get the anger under control. There’s a difference between expressing angry feelings when enraged and expressing angry feelings after the temper has been tamed. It’s healthy to express anger. A tip for expressing anger in a healthy way is to use “I feel” statements.

This anger management tip allows people to express anger without letting angry feelings take over, and without offending, ostracizing, or scaring others 

People who struggle to control angry feelings know how destructive anger can be! When expressing anger, it’s important to think carefully before sharing feelings. Plan how to express anger in a constructive manner in advance. Write down the main causes of the anger, and the most important issues to be addressed. Try to stay on topic; that is, avoid discussing problems that occurred in the past.

Find The Root Cause
Sometimes bad tempers flare because of unresolved issues, such as disappointment in one’s parents or a betrayal from a teacher, partner, or family member. If this true, then feelings of uncontrollable anger may be triggered by little issues, such as lost keys or an offhand remark. To control angry feelings, it can help to figure out the real source of the problem.

If a past unresolved issue isn’t causing angry feelings, then be specific about the present problem. Take it a step further and find concrete solutions to the problem. For instance, if it’s a person who triggered the angry feelings, work together to avoid the same problem in the future. If that’s not possible, avoid the person altogether. If it’s a situation that caused the anger, then explore ways to resolve the situation.

Anger management tips like these are often difficult to implement at first, but they can become habit surprisingly quickly. It’s important to remember that it takes practice to control angry feelings and tame bad tempers! It doesn’t happen overnight, but it can happen surprisingly quickly.Source http://behavioural-therapy.suite101.com

How to Control your Angry Feeling

As you go through life, everyone has come across a few people who have made a major impact on their life. When you think of the most influential people in your life, most will recognize these familiar skills and implement them. Some understand these secrets, but are not consistent in practicing them. The most successful understand each of these skills and focus on improving each one in their daily life.
Source http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Richard_Sizemore

1. Set Clear Company Goal

Every employee must know your essential company goals. It seems like common sense that everyone know the company's overall goals. But it's amazing when you talk to co-workers who don't completely grasp it. As a supervisor, you can't just assume your subordinates are knowledgeable. The following list gives a brief description of those skills and how to implement them

As a supervisor, you can never assume your people know your company goals. Informed employee's will grasp and appreciate, stay focus on what is important, and more importantly, limit what is not.

2. Set Realistic Completion Timelines

It's important to set realistic timelines to complete tasks. You're the expert who understands what a reasonable time to complete a given task is. If you set unrealistic goals, it says a lot about your expertise. 

If you don't understand this, you may be in the wrong job. But, if you set realistic timelines for specific tasks, your employees will respect your decisions. And visa versa, you will lose respect if you don't set realistic completion timelines.

3. Ensure Proper Training and Tools

Having proper training and tools to accomplish company tasks seem like common sense, but it's often overlooked or underestimated by managers. It's essential that you understand how to identify skill and tool deficiencies. It's also critical to keep your own personal skill levels on par with the ever changing world of technology and trends.

You should always encourage your workers to have input on training. You set the standards, but you should be receptive to new ideas. In addition, you should require your subordinates maintain accountability for company tools and to identify deficiencies to you as the supervisor.

4. Fair and Consistent

Anyone who is in charge should always remember to always be firm, fair and consistent with all of their subordinates. Being firm with an employee means they understand that there are firm consequences if they either violate policy or fail to meet company standards or goals.

Treating someone fairly means to treat every employee without preferential treatment. It's very difficult to be totally impartial when dealing with a high performer versus a low performer, but it is one of the most important traits to have as a supervisor. You will lose valuable respect from your co-workers if you're ever deemed to give anyone preferential treatment. Once you lose this respect, it's almost impossible to regain.

Being consistent is one area that is often underestimated by managers. Being consistent on how you act from day to day is critical. As a manager, it's important to be professional when confronted by an angry employee. When you remain calm and remain consistent with policy, you will remain professional. I believe being consistent is one of your greatest assets as a manager. 

5. Encourage Innovative Thinking
Every employee is important and will contribute when they feel their inputs are important to the company. If they perceive a lack of interest from management or no one is following through, they will cease future input. When an employee understands that their input is valuable, they will keep a mindset to look for improvement. Their inputs are very valuable to the success of your company. You can also encourage creative thinking through a formal or informal reward system.


6. Trust and Verification
Trust and verification is critical for supervisors who are responsible for employees who are not under direct supervision. Trust can only be earned, but it's important to verify. This can come in the form of impartial employee customer feedback.When you delegate your authority, you're showing your trust in their ability. Supervisors who understand trust allow the employee to perform at their peak. And visa versa, those who micro manage relate an image of mistrust and that is bad. Your high performers understand the importance of mutual trust and will not threaten it will poor performance.

7. Advancement Preparation 
All supervisors should appreciate the importance of preparing their subordinates to advance professionally. Not all employees want to become managers, but all employees want some type of advancement.

It could be a pay structured advancement. It could be a promotion in title only. But, it's important they understand that you're interested and can provide them with information on how to improve themselves in the company. It's important that you have this information in written form so there is no ambiguity

8. Appreciation
The basic need to feel appreciation for work performed is important. When an employee feels appreciation, they will work even harder for you. When a subordinate completes a task and does it well, tell them you appreciate it. You can never assume your workers understand how you feel about their work.
A simple thank you for a job well done goes a long way and it does not cost a penny. 

CONCLUSION

"These techniques are easy to remember and follow. If you understand them and put them in practice, you will stand out as a good supervisor. I'm confident that this article will help you in your personal and business life."

Supervision Skills and Technique Successful tips