Most people might as well flip a coin to determine if a person is lying, rather than trust their intuition or lie-detecting skills. However, the research also shows that some people are consistently good at detecting lies.

That's a rather important fact, and although it is typically ignored, it is not disputed by the researchers. They usually just mention it briefly, as though the small number of people who have these skills makes it insignificant.  Rather than brush them off as insignificant, it may be better to look at what these people are doing. Doesn't that seem like a more useful approach? And when we look, we see that one thing these human lie-detectors do is to use what they know about the individual.

When you watch for signs of lying, you need to use what you know about the person Behavior. In other words, try to think like a polygraph operator, by comparing behavior in persons under suspicion to their base behaviors. Look for a change in behaviors that may indicate lying.

For example, if a man always moves around in his chair, then this trait can't be considered as an indication of lying. On the other hand, if he is normally very calm under pressure, but starts shifting in his chair after certain questions, that is more likely to indicate lying. Always look for these personal habits and indications of lying.

This shows the flaw in the common scientific opinion which says you can't tell if someone is lying. Most research tests for things like eye-avoidance or sweating or hand movements, and finds that none of them reliably indicate a lie. However, they are looking at indicators only statistically, based on a general testing of a group, without relation to any known character traits or habits of the individuals being tested.

Examples: Suppose that out of a group of 100 people, 50 always looked away from you when they lied, and 50 always focused more directly on you when they lied. Those would be great indicators once you learned which people in the group had which behavior, right?

But a researcher asks the question, Is looking away correlated with lying? He has all 100 subjects lie when answering a question, and when 50 look away and 50 look right at the questioner, he determines that there is no correlation between looking away and lying. He'll also note that there is no statistical correlation between direct eye-contact and lying. This is despite the fact that in our example all 100 people give clear indicators that they are lying.

You see, he is looking for "universal indicators." It would be nice if there were some good universal signs of lying, some things that everyone did when lying. While there are some signs that are better than others, this approach has met with limited success. However, when you take what you know about the individual into account, you can do much better.

In fact, to take this to the next level, you should note exactly how a person behaves when he or she lies. That way, you'll have a decent indication he or she is lying the next time you see that behavior repeated. The more personal indicators you are aware of, the more certain you can be that the person is lying.

Consider:If such psychological "tells" or signs of lying were meaningless, there would be far fewer consistent winners in poker. There are consistent winners at poker, by the way, and they often win because they are good at spotting a "bluff." They also know the odds, of course. That is strong evidence right there that there are signs of lying which are useful.source:http://bit.ly/aGvZiq

Signs of Lying - Behaviors May Indicate Lying

"A big part of the stress in our lives is caused by the negative chatter that goes on constantly in our minds."

• Negative Emotion - FEAR
  Caused by impending danger or pain real or imagined. It's caused by our desire to avoid any kind of pain be that physical, emotional or even financial.
• Negative Emotion - SELF-PITY
  Feeling sorry for ourselves for our perceived suffering or misfortune. This is our reaction to a negative circumstance or action "done to us" that we feel injured us.
• Negative Emotion - ENVY
  This is a feeling of discontent arising as a result of others success and good fortune. We see other people doing well and immediately feel hard-done-by because we don't have the same level of success.
• Negative Emotion - JEALOUSY
  This is the feeling of losing a partner or possession to another. It comes from our own insecurities and also a lack of trust in others.
• Negative Emotion - Feelings of Inferiority
  This is the feeling caused by perceiving ourselves as being less worthy and capable than others. It leads to a lack of self confidence and an unwillingness to take chances in life. This in turn will lead to a lower level of achievement in life.
• Negative Emotion - ANGER
  This is the feeling of severe displeasure or extreme annoyance prompted by our own perception of people, circumstances and events that we experience in life. It is us passing judgement on that person or happening.How to Control angry feeling?

These negative emotions are such a problem because, not only do they make you unhappy, they poison your relationships, give your kids a negative view of the world and ultimately stall yours and your children's success.

ROOT CAUSE

• Justification
  Justification is you justifying your negative emotion. You feel that you are entitled to be negative because of what happened. You put yourself in the victim role. This is a downward spiral into negative emotions that will drain you.
• Rationalisation
  You putting a good spin on something that isn't too good. You explain away your reaction to make your behavior socially acceptable. You make excuses, both to yourself and others, because you feel uncomfortable about what you've said or done. This is going to provoke negative emotions in you because you are not dealing with and putting right whatever it is you are rationalising.
• Over-concern With Others Opinions
  Excessive worry about what other people think of us. We live our lives based on others reactions to us instead of our own desires and goals. This will increase our negative emotions as we will not be free to follow our own path to a successful and happy life if we are always looking at how other people think of us.
• Blame
  This is when we constantly blame other people or situations for our own behavior. We don't accept responsibility for our own lives and behavior, therefore we give our power away and sabotage our own happiness and success. This will cause increased negative emotions.

SOLUTION

• Accept total responsibility.
  Accepting total responsibility for your life, recognizing that your thoughts have shaped your reality, is the key to the freedom of creating the life you want. Regularly use the affirmation: "I am responsible".
• Refuse to blame.
  Don't blame others for what happens. Sometimes it's really tough, but we are responsible for how we react to others actions; we can react in a way that builds up and mends relationships or make things worse by our reaction. Don't blame, look for the solution and move on.
• Don't make excuses or justify yourself
  Making excuses and justifying our behavior is a pointless exercise, all it does is build up your negativity. We need to apologize for what we've done that's wrong and ask how you can make it right. That way you can feel right with yourself and the relationship is hopefully back on a good footing. Incidentally this also applies to a fall-out with our kids. If we apologize to them when we're wrong, they will learn to be mature in this way too.
• Refuse to critisize, condemn or complain.
  Every time we critisize someone or complain about something we are putting a negative vibe out there. Also with each negative thought it becomes more likely that you'll have more similar negative thoughts, in time these patterns of thought become beliefs that limit your life. We need to stop the downward cycle by becoming aware of our negative thoughts and when one pops up saying something to yourself like "thanks for sharing" then carrying on realizing that the thought wasn't true.

The positive emotions of love, peace, joy, hope and enthusiasm will flow in to take the place of the negativity which will ebb away. You will be in a better place to improve your relationships. You will start to feel a new excitement and creativity in your life which could lead to an exciting new start for you. Source: http://bit.ly/duOpq5

Free Yourself from (Cynical Thought) Negative Emotions

First Congratulation, don't forget celebrate it with your friends and your family, before you reading this, i suggest you to read How to being a good Supervisor.

So how do you make this transition? unfortunately most companies don't offer much training when they promote someone to supervisor. They may send you to one of those one-day seminars but you want to get off on the right foot now. So what you have to do? this simple things you can do (commonly) :

• Don't let the promotion go to your head
  It's true you must have done something right to get promoted, but it doesn't suddenly make you smarter then you were yesterday and it doesn't make you better then the people you are now supervising. If you walk around with an inflated ego, everyone will notice and no one will appreciate it.
• Talk to your new direct reports
  Most likely your boss will tell them about the promotion and you might have a chance to say a few words but that will be brief and not really sufficient. You should sit everyone down within a few days of the change for, exp :

+ Group Meeting
+ Let them know you will meet with each of them individually to discuss their roles and to set down expectations as well as address concerns.
+ Ask them what they expect from you.
+ Tell them what you expect from them.
"Obviously you need to figure this out before you talk to them, but things like what they need to clear through you, how you will communicate information, how you would like to be informed of things (email, brief meeting)."
+ Individual Meeting
+ Ask them how they feel about the change, do they have any concerns, are there any outstanding issues you should know about.
+ Prior to the meeting ask to review each person's file, so you can see what they were rated in for their last performance review, if there were any discipline issues, you should discuss this during your one-on-one to make sure you get it in the open and set your expectation going forward.
+ Discuss what they are working on and set expectations or set a time for a follow up meeting to set expectations (you may not know enough to set them during this first meeting)
+ Take extra time with people you were closer with to discuss how this change will impact your friendship. Unfortunately going forward you shouldn't be having lunch with your buddies unless it is with the whole department.

If you think you can maintain an outside of work friendship, go ahead, but use caution, you don't want people accusing you of playing favorites and you have to be able to perhaps discipline your friend, and heaven forbid, terminate them.

• Set up regular meetings
  Department meetings as well as one-on-one meetings to make sure you are staying in touch and communicating effectively.
• Find a mentor
  If it isn't your direct boss then seek out someone who you consider an effective supervisor or manager and see if they will help you grow and develop in your new role.

Becoming a supervisor can be a rewarding experience and the more you are willing to ask for help and admit you don't have all the answers the better you will be. Remember to communicate with your direct reports and with your boss, keeping everyone informed will help avoid unnecessary problems and issues.

If you have the opportunity to go to training classes, make sure you go, don't say you don't have time and don't think you know it all. Even if you learn only one thing, it's more then you knew yesterday. Also, training classes give you a chance to network with other supervisors and seek out advice and support after the class is over - and that goes for internal and external classes.

Like most things, supervising people always looks easier from the outside looking in, but you can be an effective supervisor if you are willing to keep an open mind, ask for help, and realize you can always learn something...http://bit.ly/PromotedtoSupervisor

I Was Promoted to Supervisor, But I Dont Know What to Do Now - Tips

We spend a large proportion of our time and our lives at work. With work related stress being a major cause of ill-health and unhappiness let us look at how to take better care of ourselves and how to take better control of our situations. Susan Leigh

Get The Most out of your Job - Be flexible

 "This attitude could make your job more interesting and enable you to become more competent in several other areas."

Many companies are going through change constantly in order to survive modern day business pressures and demands. New technology is always being developed and new business models being introduced to help companies improve their practices. Be aware that a job description is merely a guide to your required skills sets. If you are asked to do something outside of your job description try to treat it as an opportunity to grow and evolve new skills and abilities rather than as a cause of work related stress. You are entitled to ask for appropriate training but treat it as a positive opportunity.

Get The Most out of your Job - Be empathic

No doubt there are considerable pressures and demands being made on him or her, and they will have to achieve certain targets to justify their own job and yours. Appreciate that situation and realize that everyone has to earn their salary, overheads and more to keep the business ticking over.

Get The Most out of your Job - Smile
"It is about being pleasant, good natured and approachable."

Being happy is contagious. If you smile and look happy people around you will usually respond well. You will get a better reaction from the people you deal with. Smiling is not the same as being the office joker and wasting time. Looking as if you are happy to be there, doing your job.

Get The Most out of your Job - Be enthusiastic.
"Be proud of your work"

Helps you find more energy and satisfaction from the things that you do. It keeps your attitude and mindset positive and willing. Do your tasks with commitment and enthusiasm and you will find satisfaction and fulfillment from them, from filing papers to driving miles to the next meeting. Appreciate the opportunity to grow and do each task well..

Get The Most out of your Job - Be positive Thinking
"Negative though makes negative reaction"

Avoid gossip and negative people and attitudes. There is often more than one way of looking at something. Be aware of the potential for different points of view. Keep yourself in a receptive frame of mind. Negativity breeds negativity and is a major cause of work related stress. Work on surrounding yourself with positive thoughts and positive people.

The Simple guidelines above will help you to feel positive and in control of yourself and your work situation. They will help you to get the most out of your job. Have A nice day 

Getting the Most Out of Your Job - Simple Guidelines

Self-esteem is a term used in psychology to reflect a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs and emotions such as triumph, despair, pride and shame. A person's self-esteem may be reflected in their behavior, such as in assertiveness, shyness, confidence or caution. Self-esteem can apply specifically to a particular dimension or have global extent exp "I believe I am a good person, and feel proud of myself in general". http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-esteem

How many people pause to think that their children need help in building selfesteem as they grow up? It would not be surprising to find many parents overlooking this vital aspect of child growth selfesteem.

Experiences that children go through make them to be what they are when they grow up. In structuring selfesteem, selfconfidence and good image, children become competitive later on in life thus speaking their minds, challenge decisions and influencing the world positively.

"I did take time to monitor a seven year old boy who was seated near me at a restaurant. He sat up in his chair and had an almost adult like conversation with his father. Though I could not hear the conversation well, it got me thinking of what could have made the boy portray such confident self.

With further findings, I realized that it is not by chance that the boy was very confident self. Children, like adults have to be commended when they do something good. And when they make a mistake, avoid shouting at them. Instead, explain what would have been acceptable and this will help in building esteem." http://bit.ly/selfesteembuilding 

Self-esteem isn't bragging about how great you are. It's more like quietly knowing that you're worth a lot (priceless). It's not about thinking you're perfect  because nobody is , but knowing that you're worthy of being loved and accepted.

Children who take part in debate and other activities such as games that they like also build self-esteem as they practice to speak their minds. It is therefore important to enroll children in various mind engaging activities that open up their thoughts.

When possible, let children make decisions and see how they go about it. For example, you could give a child some money and let him write the order in which he would spend the money. From the list, get to understand how he prioritized the items and give an idea on how best to prioritize items. With practice, any child would build selfesteem and thus influence society.http://bit.ly/selfesteembuilding

Selfesteem Building in Children

How to Control Your Angry Feeling?

When angry feelings start bubbling up, take a "time out" for five or ten minutes. Go for a quick walk, take a few deep breaths, take your temper out on your pillow, yell at the sky – do what needs to do be done to get the anger under control. There’s a difference between expressing angry feelings when enraged and expressing angry feelings after the temper has been tamed. It’s healthy to express anger. A tip for expressing anger in a healthy way is to use “I feel” statements.

This anger management tip allows people to express anger without letting angry feelings take over, and without offending, ostracizing, or scaring others 

People who struggle to control angry feelings know how destructive anger can be! When expressing anger, it’s important to think carefully before sharing feelings. Plan how to express anger in a constructive manner in advance. Write down the main causes of the anger, and the most important issues to be addressed. Try to stay on topic; that is, avoid discussing problems that occurred in the past.

Find The Root Cause
Sometimes bad tempers flare because of unresolved issues, such as disappointment in one’s parents or a betrayal from a teacher, partner, or family member. If this true, then feelings of uncontrollable anger may be triggered by little issues, such as lost keys or an offhand remark. To control angry feelings, it can help to figure out the real source of the problem.

If a past unresolved issue isn’t causing angry feelings, then be specific about the present problem. Take it a step further and find concrete solutions to the problem. For instance, if it’s a person who triggered the angry feelings, work together to avoid the same problem in the future. If that’s not possible, avoid the person altogether. If it’s a situation that caused the anger, then explore ways to resolve the situation.

Anger management tips like these are often difficult to implement at first, but they can become habit surprisingly quickly. It’s important to remember that it takes practice to control angry feelings and tame bad tempers! It doesn’t happen overnight, but it can happen surprisingly quickly.Source http://behavioural-therapy.suite101.com

How to Control your Angry Feeling

As you go through life, everyone has come across a few people who have made a major impact on their life. When you think of the most influential people in your life, most will recognize these familiar skills and implement them. Some understand these secrets, but are not consistent in practicing them. The most successful understand each of these skills and focus on improving each one in their daily life.
Source http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Richard_Sizemore

1. Set Clear Company Goal

Every employee must know your essential company goals. It seems like common sense that everyone know the company's overall goals. But it's amazing when you talk to co-workers who don't completely grasp it. As a supervisor, you can't just assume your subordinates are knowledgeable. The following list gives a brief description of those skills and how to implement them

As a supervisor, you can never assume your people know your company goals. Informed employee's will grasp and appreciate, stay focus on what is important, and more importantly, limit what is not.

2. Set Realistic Completion Timelines

It's important to set realistic timelines to complete tasks. You're the expert who understands what a reasonable time to complete a given task is. If you set unrealistic goals, it says a lot about your expertise. 

If you don't understand this, you may be in the wrong job. But, if you set realistic timelines for specific tasks, your employees will respect your decisions. And visa versa, you will lose respect if you don't set realistic completion timelines.

3. Ensure Proper Training and Tools

Having proper training and tools to accomplish company tasks seem like common sense, but it's often overlooked or underestimated by managers. It's essential that you understand how to identify skill and tool deficiencies. It's also critical to keep your own personal skill levels on par with the ever changing world of technology and trends.

You should always encourage your workers to have input on training. You set the standards, but you should be receptive to new ideas. In addition, you should require your subordinates maintain accountability for company tools and to identify deficiencies to you as the supervisor.

4. Fair and Consistent

Anyone who is in charge should always remember to always be firm, fair and consistent with all of their subordinates. Being firm with an employee means they understand that there are firm consequences if they either violate policy or fail to meet company standards or goals.

Treating someone fairly means to treat every employee without preferential treatment. It's very difficult to be totally impartial when dealing with a high performer versus a low performer, but it is one of the most important traits to have as a supervisor. You will lose valuable respect from your co-workers if you're ever deemed to give anyone preferential treatment. Once you lose this respect, it's almost impossible to regain.

Being consistent is one area that is often underestimated by managers. Being consistent on how you act from day to day is critical. As a manager, it's important to be professional when confronted by an angry employee. When you remain calm and remain consistent with policy, you will remain professional. I believe being consistent is one of your greatest assets as a manager. 

5. Encourage Innovative Thinking
Every employee is important and will contribute when they feel their inputs are important to the company. If they perceive a lack of interest from management or no one is following through, they will cease future input. When an employee understands that their input is valuable, they will keep a mindset to look for improvement. Their inputs are very valuable to the success of your company. You can also encourage creative thinking through a formal or informal reward system.


6. Trust and Verification
Trust and verification is critical for supervisors who are responsible for employees who are not under direct supervision. Trust can only be earned, but it's important to verify. This can come in the form of impartial employee customer feedback.When you delegate your authority, you're showing your trust in their ability. Supervisors who understand trust allow the employee to perform at their peak. And visa versa, those who micro manage relate an image of mistrust and that is bad. Your high performers understand the importance of mutual trust and will not threaten it will poor performance.

7. Advancement Preparation 
All supervisors should appreciate the importance of preparing their subordinates to advance professionally. Not all employees want to become managers, but all employees want some type of advancement.

It could be a pay structured advancement. It could be a promotion in title only. But, it's important they understand that you're interested and can provide them with information on how to improve themselves in the company. It's important that you have this information in written form so there is no ambiguity

8. Appreciation
The basic need to feel appreciation for work performed is important. When an employee feels appreciation, they will work even harder for you. When a subordinate completes a task and does it well, tell them you appreciate it. You can never assume your workers understand how you feel about their work.
A simple thank you for a job well done goes a long way and it does not cost a penny. 

CONCLUSION

"These techniques are easy to remember and follow. If you understand them and put them in practice, you will stand out as a good supervisor. I'm confident that this article will help you in your personal and business life."

Supervision Skills and Technique Successful tips